Hark! Okabashi!!!
Okabashi footwear is vegan friendly and very ugly, especially since my pair spawn from the men’s collection.
I wrote those words in August 2013 and God as my witness I have been totally monogamous to this footwear, and so it should have not have come as a huge surprise when in September 2014, I discovered a rip in one of my hallowed Okabashi tanks.
Now being a responsible Okabashi owner, I had indeed googled and was informed by the heralded search engine that these sandals were “lifers”. Translation: I could take these babies to my grave so I simply ignored the tiny tear and went on with my life.
Soon the tear became quite serious and in desperate need of repair so I searched my kitchen drawers for some black electrical tape and tried to mend the rip, no luck. Surely, duct tape would be my savior……again no adherence…..so I moved on to box sealing tape which is wide and clear.
Yes!
It didn’t matter that I had paid only 3 dollars for this second hand pair of flip flops, all that mattered to me was that I could somehow make them last until it was time for me to hit the old coffin (box sealing tape and all).
Does it spark joy?
Marie Kondo writes in “The Life-Changing Magic of Tidying Up: The Japanese Art of Decluttering and Organizing,” how, she would sneak “into her siblings’ rooms to throwaway their unused toys and clothes and ducked out of recess to organize her classroom’s bookshelves and mop closet, grumbling about poor storage methodologies and pining for an S-hook.
Let me explain. Ms. Kondo’s decluttering theories are unique, and can be reduced to two basic tenets: Discard everything that does not “spark joy,” after thanking the objects that are getting the heave-ho for their service…..Obsessive, gently self-mocking and tender toward the life cycle of, say, a pair of socks……
I know what you’re thinking: could it possibly be Maria Kondo and The New York Times have aligned the universe to solve my Okabashi conundrum?
Kondo organizes socks and I am having major sandal issues.
Perfect.
Love and marriage.
Sadly, my troubles were not over; the right foot sandal continued to wear and tear and not wanting to be left out in the rain; the left foot decided to hop in and join the craze.
Once again, box sealing tape saved the day.
Does it spark joy?
Kondo’s four words had now become sort of a personal anthem for me lingering in my limbic centre.
So with Kondo renting space in my head and Okabashi monsters on my feet, I faced the inevitable….. and looked downwards…..
The once wonderful box sealing tape had lifted itself from my sandals and everything and everywhere I had been in the past six weeks had adhered itself to the sticky side of the tape….now you can only imagine the sludge, crud and crap that had been collected….
What kind of woman would wear these sandals?
I shall tell you what kind of woman……..
A woman who doesn’t know when enough is enough.
A woman who has a seriously dysfunctional relationship with even the mere thought of having JOY in her life.
Only a deranged woman with some serious self-esteem issues would ever slip her feet into these weird and wacky sandals.
My brain began to storm.
Why have I been incapable of tossing a pair of three dollar sandals into the garbage where they belong?
Just find the right tape and apply it and roll with the punches has been my style in almost every aspect of my being.
I needed to stop staring down at my feet and look upward to the heavens and have a conversation with God……however my apartment interrupted and the Divine was put on hold.
Taking in my surroundings, I realized I have certainly mastered the art of tidying ( Kondo would be proud of me), everything was in its place exactly where it should be.
And not sparking one single iota of joy into my life.
There was not one piece of art, one tchotchke or even one item of furniture SPARKING anything other than a dull pang of sadness or regret.
I summoned up the courage to walk to my bedroom and open the doors to my clothing closet.
All the while knowing more memories and regrets were waiting for me….sitting…..on hangers…….
I was flooded with questions.
Why do I own a pair of hiking boots?
How do I seem to wear out the crotch in every single pair of tights I own and why haven’t I given them all the heave-ho?
And what’s up with the hoarding of an outdated business wardrobe?I left the business world more than a decade ago.
I own clothes for a life I don’t live and will probably never live again.
I should heed Ms. Kondo’s advice.
What do I discard?
Where do you start?
It begins with the removal of my footwear, I open my apartment door, and walk barefoot to the garbage chute like a newly emancipated woman….and with wild abandon….I toss……one pair of old and worthless Okabashi sandals down the chute……
The New York Times: Kissing Your Socks Goodbye: Home Organization Advice from Marie Kondo by Penelope Green: 10/22/2014
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